1. You find it ridiculously easy to write lists like this.
2. You’re eternally grateful that you took that one class of Yoga – it has enabled you to hold the perfect pose for the time it takes to check Facebook from the free (read: crap) WIFI.
3. You automatically direct new guests to the best beds, taking into account their preference for mattress thickness, liking of sunlight vs darkness, desire to be close to the bathroom etc.
4. You’ve considered putting up signs for people to empty the bin/turn off the lights/taps properly.
5. You’ve wondered what languages other than English you should write your signs in.
6. Should you make a purely pictorial sign just to be safe?
7. You find yourself cleaning the room – the cleaner just isn’t cutting it.
8. You start referring to times in terms of people “Oh yes, the days of the German students” or “Yeah, it was during the time that Emily the Californian was here…”
9. You know the exact time to show up for breakfast to get eggs at their peak temperature.
10. You find yourself getting more annoyed than the staff when guests forget to bring their receipts for their free breakfast.
11. You’re embarrassed when people ask you how long you’ve been staying here.
12. You consider lying when people ask you how long you’ve been staying here.
13. You decide you’d better just confess you’ve been here for two weeks.
14. You’ve really been here for three weeks. Two weeks just sounds better, okay?
15. You realise people are now referring to you as a ‘resident’.
16. You’re kind of okay about being referred to as a resident.
17. You wonder what privileges you should get as a resident. A badge at least, surely? An extra boiled egg?
18. You become alarmingly protective of the dormitory when people complain. Less complaining, more cleaning, people.
19. You ponder putting up a rota for people to charge their electrical goods.
20. You deem unplugging an item mid-charge a cardinal sin.
21. You decide to add a rule about unplugging electrical items to your signs.
22. You find yourself debating what length of time in the shower is considerate to others.
23. If there’s a line of ten people for the bathroom, do you really need to floss? Move it along!
24. You’re so bored of people asking “So what shall I do here?” that you’re considering putting up your own written City Guide on the wall.
25. If you’re putting up a city guide, surely it’s okay to put up those signs you’ve been drafting, right?
26. When politely asked to switch rooms, you consider involving a lawyer and a tenant’s agreement.
27. Although you are quite smug when you get the best bed in the new room.
28. You’ve figured out a way to hide the fact you actually have two mattresses. You’ve been here three weeks, you deserve it, okay?
29. When you realise your time is nearly up, you start grieving – who knew it would be this hard to love paint-peeling walls and a leaky sink?
30. Why is leaving here harder than when you left home?
31. Should you write cards to all of the staff, explaining how your brief interactions with them will always be held in your heart?
32. Probably not. They don’t speak English and that might be hard to put into pictures.
33. You decide your gift will be your signs. Signs in five languages and pictures, just to be sure.
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About the writer:
When she’s not writing signs or drafting lists like this; blogger, photographer and dorm-dweller, Lucy Hemmings can be found at Lucysmilesaway where she is currently slowly and thoroughly exploring India. She has a passion for taking trains, drinking coffee, meeting locals and getting lost. She doesn’t take life too seriously – something her blog always echoes. To find out more, you can follow along on Facebook, Instagram & Twitter.
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